


The Tempest and the Pirate Queen

by wizardslexicon



Category: The Legend of Zelda
Genre: F/M, Post-Wind Waker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-25
Updated: 2013-12-25
Packaged: 2018-01-06 00:11:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1100180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wizardslexicon/pseuds/wizardslexicon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A snippet from the post-WW adventures of our favorite knight and princess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Tempest and the Pirate Queen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [irismon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/irismon/gifts).



> Tetra's design inspired by http://artsykleeb.tumblr.com/post/42189433327/almost-no-one-is-aware-of-the-fact-that-before.  
> Merry Christmas, Emma!

A young man sat in a brightly lit bar, drinking something stiff with no ice. It was early, and the bar was still full of light. Only a few drunkards and pirates were here at this time of day. This young man was clearly the latter. He had none of the softness of a drunkard’s body. His muscles were tight and browned from his days in the sun, and he wore faded green pants with a red and white striped shirt. A blue bandanna protected his head from the glaring sun. A belt with a skull-shaped buckle, with a small knife on one hip, completed the ensemble.

A stringy man to his left was buying him a steady supply of drinks, and slipping in sly inquiries as to the nature of the young man’s employment.

“So you say you’re one of the Pirate Queen’s men, eh?” pressed the stringy man. “Don’t believe a word. Prove it.” The young man frowned.

“This is her old knife,” he said, pulling at it. Then, he shrugged. “Don’t have to prove it to you anyways.” A man to his right chuckled.

“You’re pulling our legs, youngblood. Any real member of that crew would know what goes on belowdecks...” The young man looked confused.

“Uh...cleaning? Laundry?” Now the conversation had attracted more attention, and most of the listeners began to laugh.

“See, that’s how we know you’re lying to us, lad. You’d know...about what she does. She’s the only female on the crew, after all.”

“What are you trying to say?” asked the young man, his face flushed. The stringy man leaned in, breath stinking, and said in a carrying whisper:

“Everybody knows she fucks the whole damn crew.” A  man drinking alone in the corner raised an eyebrow. Silence fell in the bar.

The stringy man flew straight out of the swinging doors of the bar, hurled with the strength of three men. Face flushed, the young man at the bar picked up his barstool in one hand, tearing it free of the bolts that held it down, and began walking quickly outside.

“Hey, now wait just a minute!” yelled the bartender, but there was no stopping the young man’s fury. He marched outside with the stool, and shortly the sounds of splintering wood on flesh and cobblestones, screams, and angry yells filled the air. Silence reigned.

The young man walked inside the bar, carrying only a short length of wood: all that was left of the barstool. He placed it on the counter with bloody hands.

“My name is Niko, skivvy of the Tetra Pirates. No one—no one—talks about Cap’n Tetra like that.” With that, he placed the payment for the stool on the bar and walked out. The man alone in the corner put on his hat and followed.

 

“So let me get this straight,” said a woman in her late teens. Her blond hair hung in messy braids, tied back and pushed under a large tricorn hat. Her voice was heavily affected with sarcasm. “You got a few drinks in you, got into a fight with some common bar troll, and paid crew money for the furniture you broke?”

“Yes, Cap’n,” replied the admonished Niko. He looked down at his plain leather shoes.

“Link? Is this guy for real?” The man in green, handsome as ever, nodded.

“I was watching him. Didn’t know our Niko had that kind of fight in him.” Tetra’s nose wrinkled.

“Okay, swabbie. Your punishment is decreed thus: the cost of the stool comes out of your pay.” Niko breathed an audible sigh of relief, and Tetra’s eyes narrowed. “You must also spar with Link every morning for the next two weeks. Maybe getting your fill of fights will teach you self-control.” She sprang out of her chair, grabbing the deep blue captain’s cloak she had taken to wearing, and swung it over her shoulders with a flourish, epaulettes gleaming. In one swift motion, she’d walked past both Niko and Link, cloak’s edges flicking against them, and opened the door to the deck. “You’re both dismissed.”

Niko sagged against the wall as soon as Tetra left the room. “Take it easy on me, old pal?” Link laughed, his voice light and rich.

“No can do. You know she’ll be watching. See you tomorrow at the crack of dawn, man.” Niko’s groans accompanied Link out.

It was a surprisingly idyllic day. They were in harbor at Nine Peaks, one of the protectorate islands of the Gen Faa Empire. Pirates were frowned upon, but never hunted in this empire. They were too precious to both trade and commerce in the island regions, when none but the strongest dared to travel between islands. The Empress’ Navy was strong, but not quite willing to take on the mostly benign piracy in the area. As Empress Adrene was often heard to say, “Pirates are money. Only a fool destroys her own money.” In any case, no one was going to mess with them.

As if to reflect their safety, most members of the crew were either on land, buying supplies and having a good time, or relaxing at their hobbies on the ship. Link, for his part, had escorted Niko at Tetra’s request. Now that Niko wouldn’t be allowed off the ship, Link would have plenty of alone time with Tetra. But business always came before pleasure, and he needed to go shopping, too. He made his way off the ship with a yell at Tetra’s back to indicate that he was going. As he walked down onto the pier, he passed Senza, who was on his way back to the ship, arms bulging with packages. The older man winked.

“Got a few surprises for the next crew that comes for us, yeah?” Link laughed, with obvious discomfort. Senza’s surprises were often illegal and usually extremely dangerous, but they always worked.

“Yeah. I’m off to pick up some equipment, myself.” Senza nodded and went on past him, and Link continued on.

The Gen Faa Empire’s greatest boon was its trade networks: even forbidding volcanic islands like Nine Peaks, with rocks instead of soil and no hope of acheiving agricultural success, could flourish if they became part of the Empire’s commercial endeavors. So, as Link approached the open-air market, wallet heavy with rupees, he was once again astonished by the number and quality of goods offered.

To start his trip, he bought a kebab, dripping with sauce and sizzling grease, to chew on while he shopped. They were two for one rupee, so he snapped a picture of himself with the Picto Box and gave it to the stand owner so he could get his other kebab on his way back out. Then he bought a few potions, some bruise cream, a new sword cleaning kit, arrows, oil for his hookshot, and a promising new book.

Link was now nineteen, the same age as Tetra, and in the last several years had seen fit to increase his martial prowess. He was an excellent swordsman by training, and had picked up any number of weapons during his quest due to the skill-enhancing properties of the Triforce of Courage, but without that triangle on his hand and destiny on his side, he was still just a warrior. So he had pursued any number of martial arts, mastering them with no little difficulty but a great deal of satisfaction. The book he picked out was one instructing in the use of one he hadn’t heard of before, and was well worth the twenty rupees he spent on it.

He picked up his second kebab on the way back to the ship and got on, slinging his bag into his room and knocking on Tetra’s door.

“It’s me,” he called. Shortly thereafter the door opened, and Link was looking up at Tetra. She was an inch taller than him, to his extreme annoyance, but she never rubbed it in.

“Hey, shorty,” she said, standing aside to let him inside. He grimaced and took off his hat, laying it on her chest of drawers next to the mirror. Handing her the still-warm kebab, he began removing his belts, mail, and boots.

Tetra looked tired, dressed in an untucked white button-up and blue trousers with bags under her eyes. The last few weeks had been hard on her; they’d been relentlessly attacked by bands of Moblins, and they’d been at sea so long that they were starting to almost hate the uniform spread of blue. But they’d killed the monsters and entered this Empire, so the strain she felt would hopefully dissipate.

Tetra propped herself up on a few pillows, and Link, now in just trousers snuggled up into her side. Sure, he might be widely considered the most dangerous man on the seas (and have rather impressive bounties in places they’d visited), but in private, “Link the Tempest” liked little more than cuddling with his girlfriend and talking about whatever.

They both shared the predatory leanness of lifestyle athletes, for whom function was far more important than form. The main difference between them was in their shapes: Tetra was curvy and smooth, with wide hips and small breasts, whereas Link’s body was all angles overlaid by muscles. They were both browned, but Tetra was far darker, and her skin was smoother. All Link noticed, though, was how warm she was, and how comfortable it felt just to relax with her after the last few weeks.

“So Niko went through all that to defend my good name, huh?” asked Tetra, chewing on an onion. Link nodded.

“He was pretty pissed. I thought that guy was gonna die, from all the noise he was making.” Tetra snorted with no trace of delicacy.

“And then we’d have gotten arrested. You should have stopped him, you know. Or maybe you agreed with what he did...?” Her voice trailed off, and she looked down at him. He looked back at her with guileless eyes, but she’d been looking at him for a long time, and could see the ferocity that lay behind them. “Fine, whatever. Your punishment is a few hours locked in here with me...”

Tetra rolled over on top of him, laughing, and started Link’s “punishment”.

 

A few hours later, the crew had all gathered on deck, and was preparing to cast off. Link emerged from belowdecks, adjusting his hat, and took his usual place with his bow at the back of the ship. With a well placed Fire Arrow, he could take out any enemy that Zuko spotted from the crow’s nest. Shortly thereafter, he heard the door open below, and Tetra’s practiced bellow:

“Nudge!”

“Here, captain,” said Nudge from above. He sat on a chair next to Tetra’s, as her main advisor.

“Senza!” The con man saluted her with a small smile from his position manning the guns on the starboardside.

“Present, captain!” he called, loudly. People were beginning to gather at the docks, and Link took a slim white conductor’s baton from his bag.

“Zuko!”

“Aye-aye, Princess!” called Zuko from the crow’s nest. Link distinctly heard Tetra spit.

“Gonzo!”

“Yes, captain!” yelled Gonzo, hands firm on the steering wheel at the helm. His muscles bulged as he concentrated.

“Mako!”

“Right here, Captain!” called Mako from the port side.

“Niko!” The younger boy was on the ropes, checking them. Now he shimmied down and saluted her with his tarred hand facing backwards.

“Reporting, Cap’n Tetra!”

“Link!” He’d been so busy listening that he jumped, caught off-guard.

“Ready, Captain!” called Link, hoping she heard. It quickly became apparent that she had.

“Tetra Pirates, set sail!” cried Tetra. Link shot the rope connecting their ship and quickly conducted the Wind’s Requiem. At once, a strong wind blew into their sails, and the ship began to move out of port.

Tetra walked briskly up to her observation chair, cutting a dramatic figure in her cloak with the sword at her hip, and sat down, resting her chin on her fist and watching her crew. Link’s Wind Waker made sailing a breeze; they could easily make the winds favorable. But it was when enemies assailed them that all their skills were pushed to the limit. And in these free seas, enemies were all too common.

As soon as they’d gotten far enough out of port to discuss business freely, Nudge poked her in the shoulder.

“We have enough food for a few weeks, Captain. Fresh.”

“And how did you do that?” asked Tetra, interested.

“Mako figured out how to keep food cold using the same magic that makes Link’s Ice Arrows work. He’s drawn up an experimental water heating using the same principle, if you’re interested.” Thinking at once of the opulent bathhouses native to the Drefis Archipelago, Tetra agreed, and Nudge set off to tell Mako about it. Mako then hurried belowdecks, allowing Nudge to take his place.

Soon, Nine Peaks and its jutting black volcanoes were only a blur in the distance. They’d set a course for Vermeer Silk, the Imperial Head of Gen Faa, to seek an audience with Empress Adrene. Her navigators and cartographers were second to none, and if their Hyrule was on Earth, she would know where it was. Tetra wasn’t naive enough to assume it’d be free—if anyone knew the meaning of price, it was Empress Adrene—but they had a good deal of treasure in the hold. All she could do was hope it was enough.

 

A young woman wearing a well-cut dress and jacket entered a dark chamber, where the smell of burning incense permeated the very air. She immediately began to perspire, both from the stifling heat and the oppressive presence she could feel but not see. Suits of armor loomed on either side of the room.

“P-pardon my intrusion, my lady,” she gasped, at a loss for words. “I have brought news of the Tempest and the Pirate Queen.”

“Hmmm,” said a voice from the other side of the darkness. Lamps on the sides of the chamber began to burst into flames, burning scented oils. The smell grew even stronger, and the servant tried her best not to gag and insult the woman seated in a simple marble throne on the far end of the room. Above the woman was a great statue of a sea serpent, eyes formed of emeralds the size of coconuts, from whose jaws issued a cool stream of water.

The woman herself wore only a sheer silk garment, smooth enough not to offend her sensory sensitivities, and sat cross-legged in her throne. She preferred darkness, quiet and constant sounds, smooth fabrics, and strong smells, having been born with a particular difference in her mental faculties. Her skin, naturally as brown as that of the natives, had paled slightly from her long periods indoors, but her body had not atrophied in the slightest. She was short, but projected the strength and presence of a giant. This was Empress Adrene of Gen Faa, the richest person in history, the woman whose word was both her deed and damnation.

The servant tried very hard not to offend her.

“Speak, if you’re going to,” said Adrene, placing a grape in her mouth. Each grape was shipped thousands of treacherous miles, and they were worth their weight in diamonds. She had them for a snack twice a day.

“They have set out from Nine Peaks, apparently originating from the ruins of a remote kingdom. Backwards, savage types, my lady. According to General Ysmin’s spies, Link himself was born on an island so small that a single herd of pigs fed the whole lot. They seek to meet you, to use your resources in exchange for payment...if it pleases my lady.” Adrene nodded.

“It does please me. Tell me, what is your name?”

“S-Siara, my lady. Siara Norne.”

“Siara Norne, I am greatly pleased by the services you have rendered to the Empire. Your family will receive ten thousand rupees in the Imperial Bank. You are dismissed.” Crying tears of joy, Siara fled the room. Adrene raised a finger, and the lamps’ flames died out.

Adrene closed her eyes, and the flow of water from the serpent statue’s mouth redirected itself, forming a liquid screen in front of her. A third eye of light appeared on her forehead, open and glaring, and images began to form.

Link the Tempest, firing blazing arrows into a ship filled with armored Moblins and Bokoblins as the monsters used grappling hooks to board them. Pirate Queen Tetra, raising her sabre and directing her small crew to charge.

“Ah, yes,” murmured Adrene. “Children yet. I’ll see them prostrate before me...”

 

Armor was fucking dangerous.

Link had fought armored opponents before. All the stories he’d heard back home made him think armor made you slow, vulnerable, easy. His first Darknut had given him a map of bruises, some nice scars, and a lesson in one easy sentence: Armor is fucking dangerous.

Armored Moblins weren’t as bad as Darknuts, but still annoying. They had a lot of reach with those glaives, and their armor made their number of weak point depressingly low. Before he sprang into action, Link noticed that they were wearing metal armor, a huge step up from their usual leather or hide. Someone was funding the bastards.

And that was the last thing he thought before he whipped out his bow, strung an arrow, and let fly, watching it soar through the visor of the closest Moblin. It screeched, clutching at its face, and tumbled overboard, dropping its glaive and lamp. Link picked it up, preferring to make his reach equal to their own.

The others were quick to help, too; Tetra throwing fire, Gonzo and Nudge laying waste to the unarmored Bokoblins with bare fists, Niko dodging glaives and stabbing at chinks in the armor with Tetra’s knife. Link only got a shouted warning as Senza’s “surprise” detonated, killing several and leaving behind an unbreathable stench.

Link looked around, saw himself surrounded, and decided to be a crowd-pleaser for once in his life. He held his sword in his left hand and the Wind Waker in his right, then conducted the Ballad of Gales at the same time as he performed his most powerful spin attack.

Magic was like water and lightning, he’d discovered. It took the easiest possible path. And the magic that made his Hurricane Spin possible would take any spinning path available. The cyclone summoned by the Ballad took on a furious cutting edge, slicing through armor like paper, and nearly slicing clean through the deck before dispersing. It was this move that had gained Link the epithet of “Tempest”, and as the Hero of Winds, he found it fitting.

The battle hadn’t taken long; Moblin warships didn’t contain many fighters, and none skilled enough to keep up with even one of Tetra’s crew. As the monstrous flesh burst into sulfurous smoke, Tetra bent to inspect the fallen pieces of armor they had been wearing.

“That’s too nice for Moblins, right?” said Link, walking over. Tetra nodded, on the same wavelength.

“Aha!” cried Mako. “The mark on this armor shows that it’s manufacturer is—”

 

Empress Adrene watched the children on her scrying screen. They were bent over a suit of armor, inspecting it for something. Then the Pirate Queen stood up, faced towards the screen’s vision, and pointed one finger.

The Empress had hardly time to understand what was happening before it was too late, and the Tempest fired an Ice Arrow towards the screen. To her shock, the water on her side of the link froze, then shattered. Each piece moved itself into position, forming a staircase. As she watched, horrified, each member of the Tetra Pirates stepped out of thin air onto the stairs, until finally the Queen stepped into the space they’d left her, sabre drawn.

“I’d heard you were greedy, Empress,” said Tetra, “but not proud. Watching your own goons rob us blind with something as simple as a water link scry? Ridiculous.” As she spoke, her crew members began to disperse, collecting valuables. Link, for his part, climbed the sea serpent and stole the emeralds out of its eyes. Cut, they would make fine jewelry, or even just money. They were easily worth a whole ship individually.

The Empress watched carefully, then began to laugh. As the pirates tossed their treasures back through the empty air, to their ship, the suits of armor around the room, with their curved blades, began to move.

“Are you really so foolish as to assume I wait here in my chamber unguarded? Fools!” With a wave of her hand, Adrene banished the portal. “You will perish here, and I shall drink wine from your skulls for the next twenty years to teach others the folly of challenging me.” Tetra looked to the side at the animated suits of armor, approaching with long swords in hand. She didn’t know how strong they were, and didn’t care.

She sprang into the air, landing next to Adrene, and held her sword to the throat of the richest woman in the world.

“Do they prioritize our deaths, or your protection? Let’s see. While we’re at it, why don’t you reopen the screen so my boys can go back to the ship?” She grinned a massive grin, and winked at her crew. They didn’t like what she was implying...but the captain was the captain, and when she got into one of her moods, there was no stopping her. Adrene moved the water back into a screen, and Link refroze it. After a sharp punch broke it, it was time for brief farewells.

Link was the last to go. He smiled, and tossed Tetra his hookshot.

“Good luck, Pirate Queen.”

“Suck my dick.”

Link stepped through the portal.

 

The next day, all Imperial forces were recalled to Vermeer Silk to put down “a small insurrection”. The leader was said to be the disgraced queen of a long lost kingdom. The Pirates received this news with no little worry—it was their girl and whatever allies she had found versus the richest empire in the world.

On the second day, word reached them that Vermeer Silk had fallen, and a woman named Siara Norne had taken the Imperial seat. Laws were being drawn up, and the excesses of Adrene were to be abolished. Piracy was not to be tolerated, with the exception of privateers. The first instated privateer crew was to be the Tetra Pirates.

On the third day, Tetra arrived on the flagship of the largest fleet any of them had ever seen, wearing a new coat, carrying a new sword, and bearing a new scar on her left cheek. The flag the ship flew was that of the old Gen Faa, only now with a Triforce symbol superimposed on the previous sun.

Tetra smiled and waved as the massive fleet approached, and as she came close enough to hop onto their deck, shouting to set sail, Link distinctly heard Niko say:

“That’s our Cap’n, for you.”

 

 


End file.
